There is nothing in the world, emotionally and physically, more unattractive than someone intoxicated crying on the streets from a breakup. The distress, sombre tears flooding down their face, merging with makeup applied two nights ago will only put a look of shock and pity on bystanders observing the drama you have caused for yourself. Why should we settle for pity when we can stand for respect and dignity?
Regardless of the situation, the incentive or consequence, how you portray yourself after any crisis is crucial to how others view you and your self-worth.
Do we all go through this period of slight depression, where we find ourselves with solemn panda eyes, the task of eating and sleeping a shock horror? Yes of course.
But I am arguing the game can be turned around. Whether you were the one who ended a relationship on bad terms or a mutual agreement, one thing many of us will confirm is that a person is most attractive with a brain in their head. Emotional blackmail and name-calling will get you nowhere. Competitive behaviour, whether it is meeting someone new or uploading new photos via social media, are only clear signs you have not moved on.
This mindset will only encourage those around you to sympathise with you, a behaviour that drives forward depression and emotional thoughts. Regardless of how nice your friends are, how loyal they may be, you will appear like a broken record: only focusing on past memories instead of accepting the breakup and taking it as a blessing.
Acknowledging a romance is over and trying to move forward is not an easy process. Time, as many will say, is the best solution to consolidating emotions with rational thoughts. But instead of focusing on the negative, whether it is old photos or your efforts in the past for this person, why not divert your sorrow on something positive which can benefit you?
Hobbies, interests, friendships or family ties you once lost can now be rectified and brought anew. This dignity and respect you give yourself is what puts you ahead of what we see in stereotypical breakups.
Who you are, your perspective and identity are all determined by your reaction to a crisis. Focusing on you is not a selfish frame of mind. Going back and rectifying all those lost friendships, finding other areas of happiness that were once only centred around a single person will replace your sense of loss or uncertainty.
Whether you are a man or a woman, experiencing a breakup or an unexpected death, how you react to a crisis can either inspire those around you to do the same, or confirm thoughts that you have yet to move on.
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